I have Survived-Graciousness

Okay, I have been thinking about this past year.  It has been an interesting one to say the least…

In the last twelve months…

I have had a forever cold which wasn’t a cold.

I have survived several sets of unknown fevers only to find out the fevers were scar tissue expanding in my lungs.

I was told I might have 5 years to live.

I finished another year of school.

I have been told I have Lupus.

I have been told I have Sjogren’s Syndrome.

I had my fingers and lips turn blue every day for over a month.

I prepared for my death and what I would be leaving behind.

I was denied an advancement in my job.

I have been told I can’t leave my job.

Trying on clothes is exhausting, so I can no longer shop in the malls.

Walking more than 5 blocks seems impossible.

I had to beg my husband to cash in his retirement to ease my comfort driving.

But, through all this….I have had never ending prayers from church friends, leadership, work friends and family.  I am sure even a few strangers have prayed for me.

I have believed that God has a plan for me.  I have seen provisions when I thought I was at the end of my rope.  Groceries have been provided when the refrigerator was empty.  Friends have taken me out when I was at my lowest emotionally.  Miracles surprise me each and every day.  Even if it is just the sound of bird song at 5:30 am while I am walking Daisy.

There are some hurdles still.  In fact, I don’t expect the list of hurdles to get smaller.  God likes me in prayer mode.  So, having struggles keeps me on my knees.

Upcoming hurdles that I am struggling with prayer wise-

Court date for disability for my husband.  I know what I want.  I just don’t know what God wants for our family.  I have to believe God will continue to provide for our family.

I need to expand my exercise routine while avoiding sun exposure (due to medication).  Have you seen where I live?  I live in Florida!!! Sunshine state!!  Looks like the 6:30 am walks will be in order for this summer.  I have to believe that God will give me the strength to do this.

College ends Christmas eve.  What a nice Christmas present!  A Bachelor’s degree!  But, then what?  Should I look for a different job?  Should I stay?   Does this all depend upon what happens with my husband?  What doors will God open up for me with this degree?  I have to believe that God has something incredible for me this upcoming year after I finish school.

My sister is ill.  I want to go spend time with her.  Yet, due to my medication, travelling is another hurdle.  I have to believe I will get to a place in my treatment plan that I can go see her with the least amount of complications.  Only God can make that happen at this point.

Ultimately…I have to Believe God will see me through Everything.

 

 

MCTD = No Real Name

Spent the afternoon traveling to and from UM to see the rheumatologist.  I was curious to see what he would have to say about the $3,000 test that was run in CA that I am now stuck paying $300 on.  (I guess it is better than the full amount.)  He was pleased to see the difference in my hands and face immediately.  He explained that what I have is complicated (No S@#$ Sherlock!).  The bottom line is that since I tested positive for Sjogren’s, Lupus and Rheumatoid Arthritis and there are some other factors that I tested positive for, it has been decided that I have Mixed Connective Tissue Disease (MCTD).

What does that mean in the long run?  Who knows….To me it just sounds like they have no clue what is really going on with me, but the doctor is happy the treatment is working.

So, the autoimmune medication is being upped and I have been put on progression plan to down my prednisone.  I need to increase my exercise a little bit more and take off the weight I gained from the prednisone.

Nothing new there.  The only thing new I discussed with him was the burning tongue and tingling lips.  He thinks that it could be symptom related instead of medicine related.  I guess I will see as I transition over the summer to a higher dosage of the medication and get off steroids.  I will still be on the anti-bacterial due to the medication.

He did give me an exercise to help with the arthritis in my hips.  I will start that Saturday along with pushing 6 blocks for the doggie walk.