This day comes every year around the second Sunday of each May. I have gone from enjoying it, to loathing it, to completely not caring either way. I remember the days I enjoyed the children bringing home craft gifts from school and making me go to lunch with them on that Sunday to be presented with a cute gift they thought thought I would like. I also remember the days when I loathed it because I couldn’t understand why my husband would abandon me and the children placing us in hardship. It was supposed to be his job to make sure the children remembered.
Now, as I have gotten older, I understand why mom used to say to give her a day of peace. Dad used to take me out to a late lunch or early dinner and leave mom at home. I totally get that. I know that in the past couple of years, nothing pleases me more than an afternoon of popcorn and good movie alone.
My children still do the dinner out or flowers. But, I tell them not to do it on that Sunday. Church takes the time to honor every woman aged 18 and older with a flower and a small gift. Sometimes at work, I am showered with gifts.
I honestly do not want special gifts. I want time. I want someone to come along side of me to help clean the house. Take time to watch a movie with me and talk. Join me for happy hour and listen to me prattle. Join me shopping for an hour at Macy’s clearance rack.
My husband asked what he could do for me for that Sunday. I told him to hire someone to come in, clean out the kitchen, wipe down the cabinets, spray for roaches and then place everything back the way I had it. He just looked at me with a blank stare. This is something that I no longer have the strength to do on my own due to my condition.
Having this condition has made me enjoy things more and avoid others. Mother’s Day is one that I avoid. I do not want to be reminded of my mom’s passing, my parental failings or that I am now transitioning to be an empty nester. I want to be appreciated any day, not just one day.
I am curious to see what my children will do and who will remember at work. As for that Sunday. I will be working. I will be doing what makes me feel valued….volunteering at a food pantry. May I bless someone else’s Mother’s Day with great service.
For those of you who enjoy this time, I wish you continued enjoyment. If you are like me, may God bless you with inner peace on that day. That is what I pray for myself.